Oksana Grigorieva Speaks on Mel Gibson Tapes: "I Was in Fear For My Life"

Breaking her silence for the first time since the now-infamous Mel Gibson tapes were leaked, Oksana Grigorieva says she recorded him because she feared for her life, and that his response (or lack thereof) amounts to a trivializing of domestic violence.

Oksana told her unofficial mouthpiece Radar Online all about the custody fight for daughter Lucia, Gibson's vile rants and the disturbing abuse photos.

"I'm devastated. Everybody's devastated," Grigorieva said, adding that with her ex's silence, "I think Mel, basically, is trivializing domestic violence."

"It is unfair that by standing up to somebody - and speaking out - I am being victimized all over again. He has hurt so many people," Oksana said.

Grigorieva says she recorded and saved the phone calls and voicemails from an enraged Gibson that have sparked so much controversy out of fear.

"I didn't think I was going to make it through the night," she explains.

Oksana says Mel needs to tell the truth.

"Everything, by the way, this is really important, all of the tapes that you hear on the Internet, all of them were recorded that one night. The tapes, as you call them, the voicemails, everything was recorded that night because I was in fear for my life."

"I really did not think I was going to make it."

Gibson hasn't publicly commented on Grigorieva's claims, but his attorneys say he did not hit Oksana and have tried to cast doubt on all evidence.

For her part, Oksana denies extortion allegations by Mel's legal team: "It is all false information he is feeding the press. It is a smear campaign."

Saying that a court order prevents her from revealing details, she pleaded to Mel: "Speak the truth, tell the truth, for the sake of your daughter."

Authorities are still investigating both the extortion charge against Oksana Grigorieva, as well as domestic violence claims against Mel Gibson.

Oksana Grigorieva Black Eye Photo Questioned

Oksana Grigorieva's accusations of domestic violence may or may not be backed by witnesses who she says saw the argument in which Mel Gibson hit her.

Until that happens, however, much of the "evidence" she claims implicates the actor remains suspect - including the new photo of Oksana with a black eye.

The fact that the photo surfaced just this week is odd.

According to sources close to the situation, the idea that Oksana held back the photo on purpose during the couple's custody mediation in May is "absurd."

As one source said, "She produced photos of her mouth showing the damage to her veneers, she testified in great detail about the January 6 incident."

"If she had a black eye she would have said it."

So is she exaggerating or lying about the attack and fabricating evidence? That seems to be the implication, at least from this particular TMZ source.

The insider says, on the financial end, Oksana "held every piece of damaging evidence" over his head - notably the now-infamous Mel Gibson tapes.

That produced a $15 million deal she agreed to but later left on the table. The source said, "If there was a black eye it would have been $16 million."

Also, the settlement included a confidentiality agreement, meaning it would have done Oksana no good to withhold evidence she could never use.

Even more glaring doubts are cast by medical professionals.

Oksana supposedly emailed her lawyer about the attack right afterward, but sources also say the day after the alleged incident, Oksana's dentist never mentioned a black eye. Two days later, a pediatrician she saw also failed to observe it.